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Access: None
Additional Access: N/A
Difficulty: Impossible
Supervisors: Head of Personnel
Duties: Being immune to theobromine, being a liability, playing dress-up, dancing as a spaz would
Guides: Chain of Command
Quote: Woof woof. Ruff, arf, au au. Yip, bow-wow. Bark.


Hats worn by Ian will change his name, and will persist to the next round, so long as the current round ends with Ian wearing a hat.

  • Head:
    • Regular Helmet
    • Sunglasses
    • Captain's Hat (the one he spawns with)
    • HoP's Hat
    • Top Hat
    • Kitty Ears
    • Clown mask (honk)
    • Sheriff Hat (may not exist ingame, it's in the icons)
    • Detective's Hat
    • Sombrero
    • Nurse Hat
    • Beret
    • Pirate Hat (the one that looks like a pirate captain)
    • Wizard Hats (fake or real, they both look the same.)
    • Santa Hat (Yap, Yap, Yap!)
    • Bunny Ears
    • Ushanka (with the flaps up or down, doesn't matter.)
    • Chef's Hat. (Bone appetite!)
    • Hard Hats (The white CE's, or the regular yellow engineer's.)
    • Bedsheet (2spooky4me)
    • Police Helmet (The warden's hat?.)
    • A sheet of paper
    • Cargo baseball cap.
    • Cardborg Helmet
    • A special reindeer hardhat, donor hat.
    • Non-striped scarves.

Items worn on Ian's back will not persist between rounds, so don't get any ideas.

  • Back:
    • Standard Armor
    • Station bound radio
    • Blue oxygen Tank (The big ones)
    • Fire Extinguisher
    • Cardborg Suit (Yip. Yip.)
    • C4 (Rip)
    • Deathsquad armor (Good luck getting this)


It is Cargo's duty to get Ian laid. If cargo gets the corgi named Lisa, STEAL THAT DOG. Leave the two alone in a room and they will mate, producing the cutest thing ever. Corgi Puppies. These puppies will then be murdered by assistants and turned into burgers by the chef.

Jobs on Yogstation
Command Alpha Dog · Master
Security Bigger Dog · Pee On · Butt Sniffer · Smells Like Whiskey
Engineering Poly's Keeper · Yellow Dog · Smells Strange
Science Grrrrr · Maker of Loud Buzzy Things · Trouble
Medical Smells Like Cat · Smells Like Makefeelgood · Smells Like Bad · Smells Like Death · Smells Like Plague
Service Bag of Treats Keeper · Tastes Like whiskey · Keeper of the Foods · Smells Like "Plants" · Smells funny · Smells Blank · Smells like Paint · Barking · Smells dusty
Civilian Corgi Orderer · Corgi Pusher · Outside Dog · Threat, Bark at constantly
Non-human Loudvoicefromwall · Loud Buzzy Thing · Loudvoicefromcube · Metal Bug · Loudvoicefromsmallbox · Is That a Ghost Shaggy? · Walking Rock! · G-g-g-GHOST!
Special Bark, Sniff & Arf · Bigger Alpha Dogs · Dog Catchers! · Best Dog · Bike Horn Chew Toy
Races Humans · Scary Dogs · Hot Chew Toys · Icky Snacks · Not Walking Cars · Fuzzy Chew Toys · Happy Lights · EVIL · Weird Humans