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Clown (view source)

Revision as of 20:01, 21 June 2014

6,165 bytes removed ,  20:01, 21 June 2014
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imported>Kosmos
(Something crucial was missing. Added bike horns.)
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{{JobPageHeader
{{Job
|headerbgcolor = red
|pic=[[file:Clown.png|'''Clown''']]
|headerfontcolor = yellow
|Jobname=Clown
|stafftype = CIVILIAN
|Access= [[No Acces|None]]
|imagebgcolor = pink
 
|img_generic = Generic_clown.png
|Difficulty= Easy
|img = Clown.png
|Age restrictions= None
|jobtitle = Clown
|Corresponding Guides=
|access = HONK!, [[Theatre]]
|difficulty = HONK!
|superior = [[Head of Personnel]], The Honkmother
|duties = Entertain the crew, make bad jokes, go on a holy quest to find bananium, HONK!
|guides = No external guides - HONK
}}
}}
[[File:Theatre.png|300px|thumb|alt=Theatre|The [[Bar]]'s Theatre is where you spawn along with the [[Mime]].]]
''Honk if you like peace and quiet! HONK!'' [[File:Bike horn.png]]
You are... well... the [[Beyond the impossible|funny person]] of the station! Honk honk! This usually means you play harmless pranks on people to remind them that life on the station is not to be taken too seriously. The Clown <strike>doesn't have to do anything</strike> must spread the word of the Honkmother through honks and elaborate pranks. Basically the clown's job is to goof off, much like an [[assistant]], but clowns don't usually listen to anyone because they have places to be, and things to HONK!
== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] License to HONK ==
Nope, it is not a license to be a shit. Remember, you are still bound to rule one, as in don't be a dick.
'''When in doubt, ask yourself: "Are you irrevocably fucking with someone's round (killing, stealing, incapacitating, etc.)?"'''
'''If yes: don't do it. You'll probably get robusted and banned.'''
'''If no: you're probably fine.'''
== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Pranks ==
[[File:Bike horn.png|400px|right]]
This is where the [[griffon|bad clowns]] are separated from the real ones! Pranks can range from anything from harmless honks to the head to throwing random banana peels (usually people hate you for this most of all) all over the hallways, or even spamming prayers to the Honkmother for a H.O.N.K.-mech because [[Roboticist|those assholes]] don't have bananium so they could make you one.
If you are really out of ideas and on the verge of being so bored that you'll soon resort to just being a dick, here's a few things a good Clown can do to entertain the crew:
* Tell bad jokes and puns nonstop
* Hold two horns (okay one can be duck) and rapidly switch hands while spamming the use key to dualhonk
* Ride wheeled chairs with fire extinguishers
* Wear cardboard suit and helmet and be a clownborg, beep boop honk
* Wear pirate outfit and be a pirateclown, yarr scurvy (+ other outfits and roleplay)
* Bolt open the costume storage for the entire crew to use
* Build a Clown-Mart in the [[Vacant Office]]
* Insert donuts into people's pockets
* Attack Heads of Staff with the laser tag gun
* Create newsfeed channels and put out outrageous and slightly offensive accusations against people, along with photos
* Get/pretend to be a random new job, and be terrible/amazing at that job
=== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Power ===
Both you and the [[Mime]] spawn in the [[Theatre]] and have access to all the costumes inside.
If the round goes on long enough, [[Roboticist|someone]] may be <strike>demented</strike> fun-loving enough to build to you a [[H.O.N.K.]]-mech. This mech even make squeaky sounds when it moves instead of those awful clomping noises of other mechs. Make sure to attach the 'HoNkER BlAsT 5000' to it, for EXTREME HONKING! Honk!
=== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Honk ===
Honking is how you get your work done. If you honk a honk honk then honk up the honk, well you'll have a doozy of a honk on your honk to wash off.
=== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Equipment ===
You get the clown suit, a bike horn, clown stamp (for approving monkey crates) clown mask (which works like a gas mask), a special two-toned clown crayon so you can start writing naughty words all over the escape arm or eating it like a giant honking baby, a banana, and your slippery [[PDA]]. Your PDA can infect people's PDAs with a virus that makes it randomly honk, and possibly do other things? Who knows, HONK!
=== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Job Difficulty ===
Very little, but some people might want to kill you just for being the Clown. HONK!
== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Pennywise Time ==
Remember that time you were terrified by a clown when you were small? Well, this is the reason why. As a traitor, while you could possible be just funny as hell and hope people won't kill you (like using the camo projector set to "banana"), you should learn how to [[robust]] or how to break and enter! Just have fun and relax, and honk while you betray people! If all else fails, get a [[Circular Saw]] and a [[Clothes_and_internals#Headgear|Welding Helmet]] and kill people who slip on your banana peels (the scare factor is pretty high).
{|width=100% border="4" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="1"
| align = "center" |
'''Jobs on /tg/station'''<br>
[[File:jobstemp.png|link=jobs]]
|
'''Law and Order:''' [[Captain|Condom]], [[Head of Personnel|All access provider]], [[Head of Security|No fun]], [[Detective|Can't take a joke]], [[Security Officer|Shitcurity Officer]], [[Warden|Honk]]
, [[Lawyer|LOL2CAT!!!]]
----
'''Maintenance and Supply:''' [[Chief Engineer|Poly]], [[Station Engineer|Free insulated gloves]],  [[Atmospheric Technician|Axe barer]], [[Janitor|Purple Clown]], [[Quartermaster|Bureaucrat]], [[Cargo Technician|MULE Rider]], [[Botanist|Blessed patron of the Honkmother]], [[Shaft Miner|Bananium seeker]]
----
'''Medical and Science:''' [[Research Director|Honk]], [[Chief Medical Officer|Evil Bastard]], [[Chemist|Druglord]],  [[Geneticist|Likes a good joke]], [[Medical Doctor|Quack]], [[Virologist|Preacher of the Honkmother]],  [[Roboticist|Doctor Wiley]], [[Scientist|Slime Man/Woman]]
----
'''Civil Duty Jobs:''' [[Assistant|Space Hobo]], [[Bartender|Space Hobo enabler]], [[Chaplain|Heretic]], [[Chef|White Clown]], [[Clown|The most Holy of occupations]], [[Mime|Honk]], [[Librarian|Red Clown]]
----
'''Nonhuman Class:''' [[AI|Doorknob]], [[Cyborg|Is not wired to understand humor]], [[Personal AI|Your only friend]], [[Construct|Actually enjoys your company]], [[Ghost|Mime]]
----
'''Enemy Agents:''' [[Syndicate guide|Blackout Providers]], [[Changeling|Angry Ladies]], [[Xenos|Everyone]],  [[Wizard|Magic Clown]]
----
'''Special Jobs:''' [[Space Ninja|Otaku]], [[Death squad|Well-Armed Clowns]], [[Ian|Head of Snacks]]
|}
[[Category:Jobs]]
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